The Confused Indian Male!

The male gender of the homo sapian species is not unknown for it's queer ways, but I believe that the queerest are found in the Indian sub-continent.

What is with the Indian culture that makes them so confused? Why is it that guys who KNOW for sure what they want to be professionally, have no clue as to what they want in their personal life?

If I go about categorizing guys in India according to their preference of a mate/girl friend/wife/partner there would be majorly 2 types of guys.

The first type are the guys who are looking for the innocent 'girl-next-door' turned Jenna Jameson in bed. These guys want an "innocent girl" till marriage/courtship (read 'till she meets him') . Their list of preferences goes something like this :

• Beautiful, slim, delicate
• Traditional
• Religious
• Highly Educated
• No drinking/smoking but should let him drink/smoke
• No prior relationships
• Shy/Coy and softspoken
• Innocent - please don't ask me to define this, it's better to find out from the guys who have this preference

These guys want to marry a girl who has had no brain development since class 5 and hope to "teach" her about the human body. They then expect this slender, beautiful thing to become their secret playmate and live happily forever after.

Now, given a guy is (un)lucky enough to get such a girl - he would be left begging for the one thing he wants rather needs from his wife aka sex.

Such girl is innocent not because she had an unnaturally high sense of morality which kept her from discovering the nuances of the adult body but because she never had an urge (read desire) to explore such avenues. Such a girl would also have a nice shield of morality and religion teaching her that sex is wrong and every sexual urge needs to be curbed. At the end of it, the male not only ends up begging ever fortnight for his due but might also be ripped apart from his other sources of pleasure like drinking/smoking/partying.

The Second type are the one's who are looking for the One-night-stand turned Mother Teresa.

These guys are looking for a girl who he knows is fun in bed and fun in life but whom he can also show to his mother. Some qualities they look for are :

• Beautiful
• Modern
• Good in bed
• Party Animal
• Outgoing
• Drinks
• Has Attitude - (read spoilt)

This type of guy expects his high flyer socialite girlfriend to suddenly start wearing a traditional saree with a purdah, cook food for a dozen people and also secretly flirt with him.

These guys some how miss out the point that this girl can spare time to get ready for parties and make social visits because she has a dozen people weighing hand and foot over her. This girl will not all of a sudden turn into what people call "house wife materal". The funny part being, these guys also end up getting shocked when they learn that the girls has had relationshsips in her life and/or she is not a virgin. Duh uh!

I am quite sure most of the single guys reading this post are completely aware of what I just talked about. So, dear Indian guys, if you are in search of the above combinations - I must tell you it will be next to impossible to find the girl.